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One of the most difficult aspects of going through a divorce is all the uncertainty, especially around finances. It's really hard to make plans when you have no idea where the pieces are going to land. Will you be able to afford to stay in the home? Will you have to move? Will you have to change jobs or go back to work? Will the kids have to change schools? Will you have enough to retire? Will you be able to continue to save for retirement, college or emergency savings

There's the obvious grief that comes with realizing that your life has not turned out the way you'd hoped. Es[ecially for those in high conflict situations, there's the obvious stress and anxiety. For some, their experience includes a lack of support; emotional support or financial. Another hard part of divorce people don't mention: Attorneys confer with each other and the judge while you wait on hard wooden benches to find out what happens next, trusting that your case wi

These are some quick and dirty sketches I did as part of a divorce comic I was working on during my own divorce. I was making light of a dark situation because it felt better to laugh about how ridiculous things that my divorced friends and I experienced than to cry about them. In the end we did both. The original intent was that a superhero would come and save the day in each situation. This is the point where I got stuck. The comic stopped being funny to me and I aband

When I was going through my divorce years ago I picked sketching back up to help me cope. At first I started creating ridiculous comic book style characters to poke fun at all the ridiculous scenarios I personally experienced as well as stories others had shared with me. It was funny for a while, a silly kind of gallows humor with over the top villains and heroes who step in when an ex is behaving in a ridiculous manner. As the divorce dragged on, things escalated, I was w

Or am I over reacting? Chances are that if you're questioning whether or not you're experiencing abuse, you probably are. People in healthy relationships don't feel the need to ask this question. Abuse is when someone consistently and frequently chooses to attempt to control another person rather than control themselves. This control can be exerted through various ways, manipulation, coercion, threats of violence, abandonment or actual physical violence. This control can

Did the divorce really come out of nowhere?

Charcoal and Pencil Girl Laughing While divorce signals a painful ending, there is no ending that does not also include a beginning. Allow yourself the space to fully feel and grieve that ending, see a therapist, journal, reflect on your contributions to the marriage ending with your therapist etc. Then turn your attention to creating your new beginning even if it feels far into the future. Are there any things that you always wanted to do or to try that you never seemed to

Time published an article by Oona Metz, 'Why So Many Women Initiate Divorce'. Reading along I found myself nodding my head with many of the reasons echoing why I chose to end my own marriage. The main passage that hit home with me was: " …despite years of effort, they are unable to engage their spouses in improving their partnerships. In many cases, their spouses have disengaged or abandoned the spoken and unspoken rules of marriage, leaving women cornered into choosing d

Divorce will change their lives, without question. The real questions here are "will we have to move", "will they have to change schools", "will we be able to afford their extracurricular activities" and the thing that underpins all those questions, "will my kids be ok"? The short answer is: Yes, your kids lives are going to be drastically changing because divorce is a drastic change, and yes, they will be ok. Chances are high that one of you is going to move out. How dra

I wish I had known that there were more resources available to me than mediators and lawyers. I'd quickly dismissed mediation because I'd felt like I was being bullied so I wanted an advocate. Had I known about any of the resources below, I would have used them. There are Certified Divorce Financial Analysts® (CDFA®'s like me) that help you figure out your finances. There are Certified Divorce Lending Professionals that have training in sticky divorce situations who can h

Navigating Divorce Finances: A Comprehensive Guide Divorce is a challenging and often emotionally draining process. Aside from the personal aspect, one of the most significant aspects of divorce is often the financial implications. Planning and managing finances during and post-divorce can be overwhelming, but with the right guidance, individuals can navigate this complex terrain more effectively. When going through a divorce, it is crucial to have a solid understanding of yo

Going through a divorce can be incredibly challenging, emotionally, and financially. It’s a time of transition, where making sound financial decisions is crucial for ensuring a stable future. This is where divorce financial planning comes into play, providing individuals with the guidance and support they need to navigate the complexities of dividing assets and planning for the future. At Art of Divorce, we understand the importance of building a supportive community for indi